Ah Cincinnati, the most charming northern Kentucky town not named Springfield. Marge Schott. Pete Rose. Venus Flytrap. Jerry Springer. Race riots. Procter & Gamble with their creepy little satanic logo.

But hey, the high Saturday is supposed to be 81, so I’m sure the Saints aren’t exactly bitching about having to go back to Ohio for the second time in two weeks. The downright chilliness should be worth having to choke down a heaping plate (yes, plate) or two of the most fucked up “chili” concoction ever conceived by man.

Cincinnati chili is some crazy shit. To do it “right” you have to run your ground beef through a food processor first, so that it turns into some kind of freaky beef grits kind of thing. You do not brown the ground beef (what are you, stoopid?) The beef is boiled in the soupy mixture of spices, which include your standard non-fucked-up ingredients like chili powder, cumin, tomato and cayenne, and… wait for it… cinnamon and cocoa. I shit you not. more…