And you thought Oakland and Kansas City were bad.

A few weeks ago, I made the following assertion: "Without Drew, this team is Detroit."

I stand corrected. Detroit is in a class of its own. I mean… just… wow. Our old pals Moran Norris and John Owens don’t deserve this.

I suppose we’re supposed to accept this as the quid pro quo from the NFL’s schedule-makers. In exchange for the home game in London and the 42 days away from the Superdome, we got the Detroit game as our General Purpose Non-Denominational Federal Winter Holiday gift. And, as is often the case with socially-mandated gifts from casual acquaintances, we politely say "thanks" and make a point of enjoying it for a short period of time before adding it to our ever-expanding stash of clutter. Continue Reading…

Okay, it’s official. I’m an asshole (gasps of disbelief fill the internet) and I have no idea what I’m talking about. Ralph is an asshole too. What a couple of buffoons we were for asserting that the Saints simply can’t run the ball consistently and that there’s no point in trying to "commit to the run."

Sean Payton? The third member of the asshole tribunal. You tried to tell us, but we wouldn’t listen. All this time, all the Saints had to do was to run the ball 30 times and presto, Reggie’s all of a sudden good for 8 yards a carry and Pierre’s good for 6.4 a carry. All it took was a "commitment." Right?

Fortunately, Sean Payton finally realized that the only reason the Saints haven’t been putting up 150+ rushing yards per game is because he hasn’t let them. Right? But Sunday’s game proved it. And everything’s gonna be all better from now on. Right? Continue Reading…

It’s the chance dangers that I’m afraid of — the senseless, unpredictable dangers of a world falling apart. Consider the physical risks of complex machinery in the hands of blind fools and fear-crazed cowards. … They’ll reach the stage where no day will pass without a major wreck.

Ain’t that the fuckin’ truth.

What was supposed to be a road trip to Tampa turned into a trip to Bizarro World, as the Saints defense held up their end of the bargain for once. The only thing familiar was the outcome, with the Saints snatching defeat from the jaws of victory yet again. But in Bizarro World, it was Drew Brees who gave the game away. Or at least that seems to be the general postgame consensus.

With all due respect to the thoughtful commentators, columnists, beat writers and bloggers out there who came to similar conclusions, I’m gonna have to go ahead and call bullshit. Continue Reading…

Leave it to the Saints to have a Monday night game during a week in which Thursday is a major holiday which requires that you start cooking days in advance and tend to your out-of-town-friends’ doggie. Has no one the slightest regard for a blogger’s demanding schedule? Nooooo.

The good news is that it’s a perfect excuse to half-ass it for a week. High five!

The Saints sure were pretty Monday night. Oh sure, they gave up 21 points in the first half. They didn’t gain a damn thing on Carolina or Tampa (thanks, Detroit) and they’re still probably totally screwed (thanks, Marteen.) But it was still one for the archives. And I’d sooner DIE than shirk my blogging responsibilities. Still, it’s a short Thanksgiving week, and I’m not above half-assing it for legit reasons. Or any other kind of reasons. So the following is pretty much just a raw dump of in-game comments cobbled together into something resembling a recap. Enjoy. Or something. Continue Reading…

Welcome to the second part of the first installment of moosedenied’s newest gimmick feature, Glenn Frey Is An Asshole.

Periodically, we’ll pause to take a look at the current status of each of our heroes (and Jason David) individually and serve up the relevant information in convenient individually-wrapped snack-sized portions for busy professionals on the run.

Again, just to be clear, we here at moosedenied have no idea whether or not Glenn Frey is actually a real live asshole.

You can find Remi Ayodele through Matt Lehr here. Dulymus through Usama begins right……. NOW! Continue Reading…

In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king. Kinda sums up the 2008 Saints, doesn’t it?

Oh, if only every week’s opponent were a team who’s 1-18 over their last 19 games. A team that lost.. at home… to Oakland…… by two touchdowns. A team starting its third quarterback, who’s a second year guy from Coastal Carolina with a 26th ranked 76.3 passer rating.

Now don’t get me wrong, you’ve got to give credit to the Saints for their performance, especially on defense. After all, they held the Chiefs to a point total only 21% higher than their 29th ranked average. They only allowed the Chiefs 12.75% more total yards than their 26th ranked average. They only allowed the aforementioned 2nd year guy from Coastal Carolina to throw for 68 yards above his average and his third highest total of the season. No wonder so many people are heaping praise on the defense today. Clearly they’ve arrived. Continue Reading…

Welcome to the first installment of moosedenied’s newest gimmick feature, which we’ve mysteriously entitled Glenn Frey Is An Asshole.

Periodically, we’ll pause to take a look at the current status of each of our heroes (and Jason David) individually and serve up the relevant information in convenient individually-wrapped snack-sized portions for busy professionals on the run.

We here at moosedenied have no idea whether or not Glenn Frey is actually a bonafide asshole. All visual evidence suggests that he probably is, and there has to be some reason someone out there typed the phrase into Google and inexplicably somehow ended up here. Bea’s Head was so happy when she checked the logs and found someone who found this place by searching for something other than Kenny Wilkerson (Hi Kenny!) or nudie pics of one of the bandwagon chicks. So here’s to you, Timothy B Schmitt. Huzzah! Continue Reading…

Pop quiz, hotshot: When a head coach takes a team deep into the playoffs, and then the team finishes the following two consecutive seasons below 500, what does history suggest the future holds for the team and for the coach?

It’s been three weeks since the unofficial death of the 2008 season. Getting their asses handed to them by a mediocre team with a vastly overrated rookie quarterback was just icing on the cake. It’s time to shift focus.

The question is no longer whether or not the Saints have it in them to go on a run and get back into the playoff race. They don’t. The question now is just where in the hell is this team headed under Sean Payton and Mickey Loomis? Continue Reading…

Alright stop, collaborate and listen
Georgia Dome’s like a douchebag convention

Somehow the Fightin’ Mike Smiths have managed to go 5-3 and lyrical poet Matty Ice is all of a sudden the hottest thing since Tony Romo.

Must be that 17th ranked 85.4 passer rating. Or perhaps it’s the 22nd ranked 58.6% completion percentage. Or the 21st ranked 207.6 passing yards per game at the helm of the league’s 22nd ranked passing offense. Now that’s what I call lighting up the stage and waxing a chump like a candle.

This weekend, it’s the Saints’ turn to check out the hook while the dee jay revolves it. It’s also the Saints’ chance to finally climb out of the division cellar. Hey, it’s something. Baby steps. Winning this game would put both the Saints and Falcons at 5-4, with the Saints holding the head-to-head for the time being, and perhaps more importantly, a 2-1 division record to the Falcons’ 0-3. Continue Reading…

Better start pricing Tampa-area hotels for the weekend of February 1 2009, bitches! Or not.

As wins go, that was about as satisfying as a traditional British dinner. It’ll stave off the hunger for a while. But rather than basking in the afterglow, you’re just kind of relieved that it’s over and that you were able to keep it down.

You’ve got to hand it to Coach Clever Trousers though. I mean, was the difference between a win and a loss yesterday not perfectly obvious to everyone watching? Clearly it was the punting prowess of Ben Graham. The Saints remain undefeated in the Ben Graham Era, and his acquisition has to rank right up there with the acquisitions of Drew Brees, Marques Colston and Jon Vilma. Or something. Hey, Weatherford’s team lost yesterday. So… uh… yeah. Ben Graham, bitches! Continue Reading…

The Ben Graham Era begins this weekend as our band of sodding wankers attempts to muster up enough competence to bugger a bunch of pissface nancy boys in what promises to be a ripping American football match.

The Saints’ playoff hopes may be right snookered, but I intend to be jolly bladdered anyway. Of course, there will probably be no room on the sofa for me, as usual, and I’ll have to sit on the rickety chair. Bloody fascists. Serves me right for hosting a bunch of sodding Tories.

Earlier in the week, I’d have splashed out 50 quid that the Saints are all set to pack up and play out the string. That may very well be the case, but wouldn’t it be far more cruel for the Saints to win this game? Reflexively, most of us still regard the Chargers as a quality opponent. Winning this game to pull back to 500 allows us all to continue to delude ourselves into thinking this team is the dog’s bollocks, and sets us up for yet another swift kick to the front bits at a later time. That’s the Saints we all know and love. Continue Reading…