Give me perky, ridiculously cute cornball over vapid, artifically-enhanced bombshell any day. Sam takes that whole girl next door thing to a whole other level. Now if only the Travel Channel would find about 10 more just like her….
Today, I would like to share with you a personal story of internet-based ennui.
See, I have this internet friend named Peyton [last name withheld]. Peyton is going to get a tattoo on his ribs soon, but he has run into a bit of a snag whilst preparing his design. The problem is that the font of his choosing, MS Serif, is too small. He needs for the text to be far larger, because he’s a big guy with huge ribs.
Naturally, Peyton did what anyone would do in that situation. He started a thread on an internet message board to ask if anyone knew of a bigger font he could use.
He is legend.
Will Smith woke up this morning with 70 million brand spankin’ new reasons to get jiggy wit it. (Great, now DJ Jazzy Jeff is gonna start screaming for an extension too.)
And apparently, he’s about to tie the knot with this smokin’ little number.
It’s good to be the king. Right about now, it’s even better to be the prince.
As for Mickey Loomis, I guess that’s one down, two to go. You’ve gotta figure Big Number Twelve will be getting his soon enough. The going rate at the moment seems to be somewhere around $9MM (Randy Moss: 3 yrs/$27MM, Terrell Owens: 4 yrs/$34MM, Calvin Johnson: 6 yrs/$55MM) And then there’s Jahri Evans, who probably won’t snag quite as much cheese as Derrick Dockery’s 7 yrs/$49MM, but these days, you never know. You have to figure #73 is gonna have to wait in line behind #12, but if anybody can get them both done before they line up this fall, Mickey Loomis can.
Don’t look now, but I’ll be damned if there’s not only about six weeks left until our heroes (and Jason David) gather together once again in beautiful downtown Jackson to kick off attempt #3 at not losing half their roster to heat stroke making a run at one of them there Lombardi trophies.
In the meantime, there’s so little in the way of actual news, the Times-Picayune has resorted to publishing articles on John Fourcade’s desire to become the head coach at West Jeff.
The silver lining is that I’m now aware of the existence of the Intense Football League. You can tell that they’re big time by that bitchin’ web site.
We’ve warned you before that part of the price you pay for reading this here blog is occasionally having to put up with a post about something you don’t give a shit about.
This could very well be one of those times, because today, I feel like posting my MLB All Star ballot. And while I’m at it, I’d like to shamelessly hype Geovany Soto, Catcher for the Chicago Cubs and future NL Rookie of the Year.
It also gives me a chance to make a supid BASIC-themed pun. And that’s always big fun. I’ll start with the American League first, because I don’t really care about the AL.