"Sir, there's an angry mob here to see you."

"Do they have an appointment?"

Sheesh, who knew there would be so many Saints fans there to shake my hand and share the land that they'll be giving away when we all live together? Talkin' 'bout together now. By golly, it's a fuckin' brotherhood of man! And here I am with nary a fleur to put in my hair. Perhaps I'll stop by the Free Store and pick up a handful on the way to the protest march. Continue Reading…

Bet it never crossed your mind that you'd remember Garrett Hartley for the rest of your life, did it?

If you don't mind, I'm going to leave the emoting and broader-context "what this means to the city and its people" stuff to people who are far better at it than I would be. No talk of kharma or divine intervention. No reminiscing about the bad old days and what a long time coming it's been. Those are all beautiful things, important things, powerful and inspirational things. Things that we'll be talking about for the rest of our lives. But for now, my mind is still focused solely on this football team. MY football team. The best damn football team in the NFC, bar none, without a doubt. A team that, in two weeks, will be crowned the best team in the whole damn National Football League. Because, make no mistake about it… We got this. Continue Reading…

Looks like they were paying attention up in Minneapolis when the Saints brought Dulymus back Friday.

Word on the street is that Gerald McRaney Brad Childress has also puchased for each member of the team a hockey stick inscribed with the motivational slogan: "Bleed all over 'em. Let 'em know you're there." It's brilliant, I tells ya. Personally, I'd have gone with "Walk down that stinkin' runway, open up that faggot robe and wiggle your dick at 'em!" But that's just me. That's probably what King Brett has planned for his press conference anyway. Continue Reading…

Cha ching! REG-GIE! REG-GIE! REG-GIE!

Holy shit. Talk about answering all the questions. With authority. That was clearly the best overall team performance of the season, and quite possibly of the Sean Payton era. It couldn't have come at a better time, and it was just what the doctor ordered after the way the regular season ended. An absolute thing of beauty. Doubts? Erased. This is really happening. At long last, it's finally happening. For real this time. The New Orleans Saints are going to the Super Bowl. Continue Reading…

The Cardinals are so very, very fucked.

Update: Apparently, it was all a huge mindfuck. Thanks, Saints. Way to get us all fired up. For a couple hours. The day before the game. You can almost hear the "PSYCHE!!!" coming from Airline. Nice. Just fuckin' lovely. Smoove play there, assholes.

WARNING: This post is gonna blow.

Aaaand here we go. Finally. At long last, the real Saints are back (or so we've been led to believe) and so are meaningful games. It's about time. Now the only question is whether or not the mojo will be back.

You'll be happy to know that we here at moosedenied have done our part. Yesterday, in a small, private ceremony, several "Unknown Who Dat for Mayor" tee shirts met their ignominious demise in a furious blaze of irrational, effigial rage. I'm not usually one to indulge in such superstitious asshattery, but desperate times call for desperate measures. You're welcome. Or something.* Continue Reading…

Aw shit, here we go. Admit it, you know it was one of the first things to cross your mind when you heard the news. You don't have to be a "hater" for it to have popped into your head for a fleeting second. I'm not suggesting that you like the idea. In fact, you might very well have recoiled in horror at the thought.

But whatever your feelings on the matter, you might oughta think about going ahead and strapping yourselves in. Because it's only a matter of time, about a month or so, before this thing becomes a big, BIG deal. I'm not saying that it's going to ultimately happen. But I can just about guarantee this: there will be drama. Big, huge, crazy ass drama. The only question is who'll be the first "legitimate media" type to get the ball rolling. I'm gonna go with Jason Cole. Heh. Continue Reading…

I don't believe it! There she goes again! She's tidied up, and I can't find anything! All my tubes and wires and careful notes, and antiquated notions…

Guh. Thank god that's over. What a crappy month of football. The good news is that now the real fun begins. Oh, I'm not talking about the Saints' run to the Super Bowl. That's still what might as well be an eternity away. No, I'm talking about the two-week parade of anecdotal factoids which prove… PROVE!… that one outcome is more likely than another. I just can't get enough of those. Say, did you know that the last time an NFC West team other than Seattle lost the Superbowl (the 2001 Rams) an NFC South team won the Super Bowl the following year? And who lost the Super Bowl last year? That's right, an NFC West team other than Seattle. And who's the only NFC South team in the playoffs this year? Science! I defy you to refute such sound reasoning! Continue Reading…