The Falcons would stand a better chance with Pat HarringtonYou know that you’re not exactly sitting on top of the world when even your staunchest defenders can muster little more than: “Hey, he’s not that bad!”

When page three of the Google Image Search results for your name includes a picture of an assortment of butt plugs.

When the most pressing issue facing your current employer is finding some kind of way, any kind of way, to avoid having to put you on the field.

When your boss is asked how the offense will function with you at the helm, and his response is: Hey, ANYOBDY could run this offense. (…even this schmuck, if, God forbid, it comes to that.)

Oh sure, he has millions of dollars, but… but… wait, what was my point again? Oh, that’s right. Being Joey Harrington must be pretty sweet. Give me tens of millions of dollars and I’ll gladly be a walking joke. Seems to be working out alright for Aaron Brooks.

Still, it’s gotta suck on some level. Probably not as much as it sucked for Pat Harrington while waiting for Valerie Bertinelli to turn 18, but probably in that ballpark.

I mean, here’s a former 3rd overall pick who, since then, has been benched in favor of Jeff Garcia, traded due to the presence of Josh McCown and Jon Kitna, and then benched again in favor of Cleo Lemon.

Cleo fuckin’ Lemon!

You get the feeling that the Falcons and their fans would be more comfortable with Meadowlark Lemon under center than Joey.

Which might not be a bad idea, actually.

Everywhere you turn, people are tossing out potential alternatives which run the gamut from interesting to “Holy shit, they’re that desperate to avoid Joey?!?”

DJ Shockley. Daunte Culpepper. Seneca Wallace. Mark Brunell. Chris Weinke. Aaron Brooks. Jeff George. Chris Simms. Chris Chandler. Chris Miller. Bobby Hebert. Steve Bartkowski.


You kinda sorta almost feel sorry for the guy. He has been knee deep in shit ever since he was drafted. But mostly it’s just really, really funny. Excruciatingly funny. Because it’s the Falcons.

Please feel free to pimp us on your favorite social media service: