Question: Have you thanked your personal lord and savior for these here intrawebs today?

If not, you might want to get on that pronto. Especially if you’re a Saints fan.

Thanks to Google Alerts, over the last year or so I have been hipped to a veritable assload of media sources for Saints information to which, otherwise, I’d have remained blissfully ignorant. (The key word there is “blissfully.”

One of those sources is the venerable Ed Staton over at BayouBuzz.com. All together now…. “Who???” Fuck if I know. But he looks all stately and shit, what with the pomade and the Aqua Velva (What, you can’t see the fumes?) and such. So I’m gonna go ahead and assume he’s venerable. Or at least, there are probably a few people out there who do, in fact, venerate him. Or something.

 Ed’s a badass. Want proof? Check this out:

On July 25, the Saints will descend on Millsaps College in Jackson for training camp, but first the team wants to set the record straight regarding the truth and rumors regarding its return. For months there has been speculation regarding the team’s return to the small school on the north edge of Jackson.

Coach Sean Payton credited the training camp throughout the season as an experience the team greatly benefited from en route to their NFL South title and appearance in the NFC championship game. The speculation ended last week when the team announced it would return. However, through the past few months, rumors and speculation, often completely inaccurate and baseless, seeped into media reports and seemingly the public’s consciousness. Primarily among the facilities was the Saints’ reported request for Millsaps to build an indoor practice facility. 

Saints  and Millsaps officials addressed the rumors and truths on their Web site.

See, that right there is some good shit. Doug Miller over at NewOrleansSaints.com would be proud. Especially since he wrote most of it:

In slightly more than a month, the Saints will descend on Millsaps College for their annual training camp on the intimate college campus in the northern edge of the city of Jackson, Mississippi.

For months there has been speculation regarding the team’s return to the school, which Head Coach Sean Payton and Executive Vice President/General Manager Mickey Loomis often credited throughout the 2006 season as an experience the team greatly benefited from en route to their first ever NFC South title and a foray into the NFL Championship game.

The speculation ended yesterday when both the Saints and the Millsaps officially announced that the Saints would return for what everyone associated with the team and the school hope to be as successful a foundation to build from as proved to be in 2006.

However, throughout the past few months, rumors and speculation, often completely inaccurate and baseless, seeped into media reports and seemingly the public’s consciousness. Primarily among the fallacies was the Saints’ reported request for Millsaps to construct an indoor practice facility.

Nice fuckin’ work there, Ed.

The next sixteen paragraphs, by the way, are a 100% copy/paste job from the press release/official site. Hey, I’m not gonna call plagiarism or anything like that. I’m sure the franchise doesn’t mind one bit. But if I were Ed, I’d be fucking embarrassed. Either that, or sipping on my 4th Sazerac and laughing at how easy my gig can be sometimes.

Still, I suppose it’s still slightly less brutal than trudging through a Peter Finney piece.

Shit. 

Meantime, over at SR.com it appears that it’s only a matter of time before WWL super-stud Kenny Wilkerson gets shot in the left arm by his own guys.

Talk about a trainwreck. How is it that someone so arrogant and petulant (I’ve left links in case Kenny needs to look those words up, you know, so that he’ll know why he’s pissed at me) can hold down a job as the face of the Saints’ flagship radio station?

The irony is that Kenny’s stated goal was to elevate the public’s perception of him, in ways that just can’t be accomplished via the medium of talk radio.

Which, of course, is bullshit even on its face. Unless you’re one of those radio guys whose schtick it is to have people “love to hate” you, if you can’t make them like you on the radio, then you’re doing a piss poor job, and appealing to the masses via a message board isn’t going to change that. Even if it is SR.com, a message board that has a far more impressive following than your “million-plus listeners a week.”

And guess what, Kenny? Everybody knows that but you.

I’d type more on ”Kennygate” but I think it’s gonna require a whole fucking series of posts to do it justice. Stay tuned. Or not.

Meantime (part 2) Gerry Valliancourt is back in town.

Lovely. BOOMER SOONER!!!!

Here’s a guy who just happened to be ON FUCKING VACATION last year as The Reggie Bush Experience was taking off. As Our Heroes, who we were pretty sure we had lost forever, came home. As the greatest season of our lives was just starting to unfold. Or, in other words, when his listeners needed him the most.

Reggie signs (at the time, not exactly a mere formality) and where was Gerry?

Reggie arrives at camp. Where was Gerry?

Our beloved Saints are back in New Orleans! WHERE THE FUCK IS GERRY?!?!?

Good thing I never gave a shit.

The irony of the whole thing, the kind of irony that makes you want to shove a screwdriver into your own throat, is that it’s supposedly the bloggers and message board guys and other “new media” types who are supposed to be the lazy, uninformed amateurs with Cheeto-stained fingers, who sit behind their keyboards in their mothers’ basements braying on and on about shit they don’t really know anything about.

It’s supposed to be the new media guys who just regurgitate information that’s already available thanks to the talent, connections and cache that the old media guys worked years to develop.

It’s supposed to be the old media guys who are the go-to source for the straight dope. For the thoughtful, meaty information and analysis hardcore fans crave.

Welcome to 1989.

 For those of us stuck here in 2007, all together now: “BULLSHIT!”

Besides, Billy Ryckman owns all their asses anyway.