Is it any wonder Vinse Yung is the leader of the Titans? The original leader of the Titans (otherwise known as the children of Uranus, which is a strikingly appropriate homonym) was Cronus. He cut off his dad’s cock and threw it into the ocean. Then he married his sister and knocked her up six times. Cronus didn’t want the kids, so he ate them. Except for one. Cronus’ sister/wife tricked him by giving him a rock wrapped in a blanket instead, which he promptly ate. Ha, what a chump. The surviving son, Zeus, eventually cut off Cronus’ cock and sent him to hell.

Only in Texas.

The Saints offense comes into this game with a simple goal: Try to put up a score higher than Vinse did on his Wonderlic. The defense will be hoping the Titans don’t top that on their first drive.

Though, to be fair to Vinse, the rumors that he put up a mind-numbingly-shitty 6 on his Wonderlic did turn out to be false. (Or, as Vinse would put it, "not write." ) What actually happened was that when Vinse wrote his name at the top of the test, he spelled it with a six. Six was also his answer to the question: "What is the opposite of up?"

Wow, I was skeptical, but nope, Vinse-is-a-spectacular-moron jokes are still funny.

I once had the pleasure of watching Vinse play chess against Aaron Brooks. It ended in a stalemate after they had lined up their pieces, but neither one of them could figure out how to turn it on so that the board would start vibrating.

On the surface, it looks like it might be another long night of punching ourselves in the groin to take our minds off the more intense emotional pain being inflicted upon us by a superior opponent. The Titans beat the Jagwires in week one, and held Indy to 22 points while losing by only two last week. Until proven otherwise, the Titans are better than the Saints. A lot better.

Fortunately there are some alternative strategies the Saints may be able to employ to gain an advantage.

Word is that Vinse is easily distracted by shiny things, so if anyone who plans to attend has any doubloons hanging around the house, bring them with you to the Dome.

If the Titans happen to win the coin toss, the Saints reps at midfield should try to convinse Vinse that the Titans have won, and that he can go ahead and hit the showers.

Tennis ball hooked to a fishing line. Cast, reel in, repeat.

All it takes is a little outside the box thinking. Or getting their heads out of their asses. Either way works for me. But until you’ve proven the latter, might as well prepare for the former. What would Bill Belichick do?

Meantime, I have a confession. I fear the visor coming to Baton Rouge Saturday afternoon. I wish I didn’t, but I do. I fear that the visor might figure out a way to keep LSU’s margin of victory below 40. I fear that the visor might figure out a way to score more than once on LSU’s defense. I fear that the visor might even team up with the artist probably never to be known as Jerry to hold the Tigers under 30.

And if the Tigers are held below 30 at any point this season, they’ll surely drop out of the AP top 10. The good news is that the AP is about as relevant as Dennis Kucinich.

Still, you just know that "style points" such as margin of victory and, you know, all other stats, are mysteriously going to start counting right about the time LSU plays Florida. It’s right about that time when they’re going to mysteriously start pointing out once again that strength of schedule doesn’t count. Douchebags, all of ‘em.

Go ask Dulymus a question or two. And keep it clean, assholes.